[ Is it a comfort to know that every separation will come with a reunion? It's a consolation, even if it's not the solution to the pain of never being perceived as anything but what the world will require of them.
Still, they have what they have. Unbreakable. Clive meets Joshua's soft flutter of a kiss with a careful touch of hand to hair, lingering anxiety regarding the sickness under his brother's skin making all of his gestures more muted, tentative. ]
I want more for you than 'enough'.
[ It seems such a cruel thing to consign Joshua to. 'Enough'. But Clive doesn't push it, not wanting to spend precious time arguing over the things they currently can't fight for, and so he relents to his brother's request as best he can manage－
－which really just boils down to giving the bed his deadweight. Sleep is not an option for him, in case anything worsens while Joshua closes his eyes; there are limited supplies in the room and threats all around them in this cursed castle, and all he can see when he shutters his eyelids is the bright red of Joshua's blood pooling between his teeth.
Another nightmare to add to his piles. Fine. Let Sanbreque lord this one victory over him. They won't have the satisfaction of knowing about it. ]
...We'll speak of the future once our work here is done. Close your eyes, brother－ let the Phoenix tend to you for a while.
[ And, like that, seconds bleed into minutes bleed into hours. The sun resumes its slow crawl on the opposite side of the earth, and takes its time screaming back up over the horizon, while Clive remains floating in that nebulous space between wakefulness and half-dreaming, stroking gold hair and replaying fraught memories in the safety of his head. ]
[Joshua sleeps quickly, easily. His body needs it, his eikon demands those hours of rest as it works to repair the damage done. As he slips into sleep, Joshua worries briefly that he might not wake, might sleep for far too long - just as he did after Phoenix Gate, as his body healed. But he can't avoid sleep, so he simply has to trust that the damage isn't so terrible.
He needs the rest, and his own anxiety is soothed by having Clive so near. Deep down, he thinks that if Clive is there he'll always be safe. Joshua probably always will believe that, no matter what might happen. It lets him relax, lets him steal a few scant hours in which to heal.
It isn't enough. When he wakes, his body still aches, still feels weak. It's better, at least, that much is true, but even as Joshua blinks sleep from his eyes he feels the tired disappointment of knowing that it will take longer for him to heal. He knew that already - such a strong poison, he should simply feel lucky to be alive - but he's impatient, he wants to no longer be vulnerable.
But it's better. Perhaps only a little bit, but it is.
The first thing his eyes rest on is Clive. It feels right to have him there, as if he should always be near when Joshua wakes. Such a selfish, spoiled thought, but how can he help but have it? He's still sleepy, still only just awake, when he asks softly:]
Did you sleep at all?
[Joshua thinks he knows the answer, but he asks anyway. And his voice sounds better, not so raw, the damage to his throat healing.]
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Still, they have what they have. Unbreakable. Clive meets Joshua's soft flutter of a kiss with a careful touch of hand to hair, lingering anxiety regarding the sickness under his brother's skin making all of his gestures more muted, tentative. ]
I want more for you than 'enough'.
[ It seems such a cruel thing to consign Joshua to. 'Enough'. But Clive doesn't push it, not wanting to spend precious time arguing over the things they currently can't fight for, and so he relents to his brother's request as best he can manage－
－which really just boils down to giving the bed his deadweight. Sleep is not an option for him, in case anything worsens while Joshua closes his eyes; there are limited supplies in the room and threats all around them in this cursed castle, and all he can see when he shutters his eyelids is the bright red of Joshua's blood pooling between his teeth.
Another nightmare to add to his piles. Fine. Let Sanbreque lord this one victory over him. They won't have the satisfaction of knowing about it. ]
...We'll speak of the future once our work here is done. Close your eyes, brother－ let the Phoenix tend to you for a while.
[ And, like that, seconds bleed into minutes bleed into hours. The sun resumes its slow crawl on the opposite side of the earth, and takes its time screaming back up over the horizon, while Clive remains floating in that nebulous space between wakefulness and half-dreaming, stroking gold hair and replaying fraught memories in the safety of his head. ]
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He needs the rest, and his own anxiety is soothed by having Clive so near. Deep down, he thinks that if Clive is there he'll always be safe. Joshua probably always will believe that, no matter what might happen. It lets him relax, lets him steal a few scant hours in which to heal.
It isn't enough. When he wakes, his body still aches, still feels weak. It's better, at least, that much is true, but even as Joshua blinks sleep from his eyes he feels the tired disappointment of knowing that it will take longer for him to heal. He knew that already - such a strong poison, he should simply feel lucky to be alive - but he's impatient, he wants to no longer be vulnerable.
But it's better. Perhaps only a little bit, but it is.
The first thing his eyes rest on is Clive. It feels right to have him there, as if he should always be near when Joshua wakes. Such a selfish, spoiled thought, but how can he help but have it? He's still sleepy, still only just awake, when he asks softly:]
Did you sleep at all?
[Joshua thinks he knows the answer, but he asks anyway. And his voice sounds better, not so raw, the damage to his throat healing.]